From a Wish to a Prayer

Now, this is serious.

My head’s been in a real daze this week.

Background

I was assigned this project when i started with the Company. It was more like “handed over” to me in the sense that I wasn’t given any preludes or introductions as to what it is about. Good thing the project’s name is very straightforward, otherwise I would still have a hard time figuring out what it’s about.

Anyway, when I was finally briefed into it, I was told that we were just waiting for the targets to be given to us for upload. Cool, or so I thought. Turned out it wasn’t that simple. When I was asked last Feb. 15 to present it, it was just then that I began realizing the complexity of the “issues” that needed to be resolved. I was at a loss that to call it complicated is a bit of an understatement. Anyway, one of the senior officers told us to postpone it for the timebeing and do a bit more of “cleaning up” and debugging.

Hell Week

Okay, to cut the story short, I was once again asked to present it after one week. No sweat, after all we’ve already done the necessary clean up and all. Or so it seemed. What happened during the succeeding days were so incredulous that, indeed, I couldn’t find a proper adjective to describe these. To top it all, everyone was losing his temper. Anyway, what really pissed me off was the “choice of words” of the man I was working with. Well, actually, he wasn’t choosing his words anymore. I just thought, “deja vu.”

He was firm with his resolve to present it. So I just said to myself, “Oh great, waht will I say? How will I do it?” because I was really at a loss. So, my neck is on the line. I felt really vulnerable, with my self-esteem really low. I just said, “Dear Lord, I’m seriously praying for a miracle. Please help me ‘coz I haven’t really mastered the project yet.” Worst thing was I was made to feel stupid when the fault wasn’t really all mine.

Answered Prayer

So the weekend passed and Monday morning arrived. It felt like my worst-ever Monday. “This is it, my moment of truth,” I said to myself. And then suddenly, the miracle that I prayed hard for. “I will present it,” said the man. His words were literally music to my ears. I felt like the angels went down from Heaven and took me into their arms for a split-second.

And so he did the presentation. Everything went smoothly. It was also great that management liked it too.

What really made me happy was the fact that I know God really listens and that He does not forsake those who ask for His intervention.

Moving forward, I am hoping that the project will run smoothly in the future and that every glitch could be fixed already.

Of course, I will still continue to pray very hard.

Wishing On Another Silly Star

(This is supposed to be a serious [read — dramatic] post]

Please forgive the title. I just couldn’t think of something that could better describe this post. Number one — wishes, to some extent, are like jokes. They are “half-meant” (or in a way, sincere) although I believe that the percentage of truth in a wish is around 75 to 80%. Number two – I’m wishing on a silly star because I reckon it is only he who could understand a childish blabber.

So, on with my topic…

For the past two weeks now, my somewhat ridiculous mind has been “cooking” something that’s worthy of writing in a grade school’s activity notebook. Well, I’m creating this scenario in my head wherein God will send a fairy Godfather (or a magical uncle?) who will grant my every whim. Another “what if?” thing to be exact. This was definitely not something new but I guess it was just a way, a sort of diversion, to ease my throbbing mind.

The reason…well, I was kinda stressed out with work lately. I once again found myself in a situation that I swore I wouldn’t be caught into anymore. It was really bad (at least for me) because this time I was already blaming myself for it. It was just so sad to think that maybe it was I who was wrong all along. Hence, the wish to be just somewhere quiet and cool and breezy.

Anyway, if my wishes were to be granted I guess I would still ask for something more important (like world peace…hehe) since it would be such a pity if I would just waste the opportunity on trivial stuff. So, spontaneously I thought of things that I feel would be of much value and significance to my life. These need not be profound in order to warrant inclusion in this list.

If all my wishes would be granted, I would want to be:

1. Smarter. Not necessarily book-smart but more like street-smart. I believe that being street-smart allows one to handle a variety of situations as well as people/personalities. Likewise, a street-smart person if very confident and sure of himself. He is strong-willed and would not easily give up.

2. Good at presentations/talking. OK, I admit it. I still have “stage fright.” I get nervous when I am required to talk, even if it’s just a small and informal meeting with my bosses. I’d like to gain more confidence.

3. Skillful with handling people. I don’t really know why, but I seem to be bound to be in a rift with somebody wherever I may be and however I handle the situation.

4. More creative. I’d like to experience how it is to express oneself through the arts. Plus, I want to do more and achieve more.

As they say, it’s always free to daydream. These may or may not come true but that will depend entirely on me. I can act and do something about it. To begin with, the things I stated above aren’t really miracles. Or I can just sit back and wait for my enchanted Godfather to come and snap his magical fingers so that my all my heart’s desires will come true. What do you think?

Anyway, I believe I have more in my head but more for my family and the people who are important to me. I’ll post a separate blog on these.